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READING RESOURCES

Book Review

The Weekend Marriage By Mira Kirshenbaum

Read Dr. Harber’s review here in pdf format.

Thinking About Marriage?

Are You the One for Me? Barbara De Angelis, Ph.D. paperback.

The subtitle "Knowing who's right and avoiding who's wrong" is a good preview of the contents. The first major section, Understanding Your Love Choices, is a no-nonsense description of the nature of love, including a chapter titled "The six biggest mistakes we make in the beginning of a relationship." The next two major sections are devoted to Avoiding Who's Wrong and Knowing Who's Right.

The book is a very helpful resource, especially if you are not in a relationship yet or in the very early stages of one. However, even if you're deeply involved with someone, it's good to use this book as a reality check.

Relationship Flat or Troubled?

Relationship Rescue. Phillip McGraw, Ph.D. Paperback

Dr. Phil pulls no punches. If you've seen him on TV and you like what you see, you'll love this practical guide to getting your relational act together. The first section of the book is extremely important and should be worked through, not just read. Dr. Phil makes it clear that the first step in rescuing a relationship is for you to take responsibility for your contribution to the problems.

This book is not for those looking for an easy read or an easy way to "fix what's broken." It will be hard work, both emotionally and intellectually, but it will be worth every tear and drop of sweat. It's actually a good alternative to marriage counseling-if you're honest with yourself. It would be nice if your partner read it too, but you can accomplish plenty on your own.

Need Help Discussing Sexualty?

A Blessing for the Heart. James E. Sheridan

Dr. David Olson, the director of Life Innovations, Inc., the group which is the author of PREPARE which we use for engaged couples, highly recommends this book. He writes, "Sheridan's insightful book helps couples discuss sexuality, which he presents within a spiritual context. This is a user friendly book that both premarital and married couples will benefit from reading and discussing."

James Sheridan is an innovative Judge from Michigan who has long been an advocate and user of the PREPARE/ENRICH Program. As a Judge, he has seen the rising rate of divorce and custody battles. He realized the importance of a strong marriage and this book opens the door for discussion of sexuality.

From the first chapter, "Men and Women: A Biblical View", to the "Final Send-Off", Sheridan provides a clear understanding of intimacy in a biblical marriage. There are numerous scripture lessons from the Song of Solomon which are followed by sound insights on the differences between men and women in the areas of affection and sexual fulfillment.

To order:
Marriage Done Right
10864 Burton Road, Adrian, MI 49221
Phone: (517) 547-4905
Cost: $14.50 plus $3.00 shipping
For more information about the book, go to: www.marriagedoneright.com

Want a Stronger Marriage?

The Power of Two: Secrets to a Strong & Loving Marriage. Susan Heitler, Ph.D. Paperback

This is a book about communication. And since every marriage can benefit from improved communication, this book can help you. The theory about the nature of communication is great, but the strength of the book lies in the excellent, clear and real examples of dialogue. The summary tables are extremely useful as well. This is not a book to just read, however. It is a book to study, to pour over, to use as your motivation for practice. If you partner reads it as well, the results should be dramatic. But, it's no easy fix. Changing long standing habits of communication is difficult. However, the reward is well worth it.

Feeling Out of Control or Feeling Controlled?

Love Is A Choice: Recovery for codependent relationships. Drs. Robert Hemfelt, Frank Minirth, and Paul Meier. Paperback

"Codependency," say the authors, "can be defined as an addiction to people, behaviors, or things. Codependency is the fallacy of trying to control interior feelings by controlling people, things, and events on the outside. To the codependent, control or the lack of control is central to every aspect of life." Codependency seems to have gone out of vogue. A few years ago every popular magazine had articles about it and one book after another rolled off the press. The popularity is gone, but the reality is still with us. This book is an excellent beginning point in understanding how our past can continue to negatively impact our present.

Helpful Links

www.bettermarriages.org The Association for Couples’ Marriage Enrichment

For more information, contact Jerry Harber.